From: barticle@hotmail.comDELETETHISBIT (Bart)
Subject: raver defence
Date: 6 Oct 1997 15:09:48 GMT


i thought that the following essay deserved to be posted up here. although it 
is, indeed, the sort of nonsense that i'd pen i'm afraid that i can't take the 
credit for it. a friend of mine mailed it to me but when i asked her about 
it's origin she could do no better than to reply "the internet" - i.e. she 
can't remember. ;) 

given the reference to PLUR it might even have originated from this very 
newsgrope or maybe it was created by some other organisation that uses that 
same terminology.

here it is anyways (with my own annotations in square brackets)...

_____________________________________________________________________
Recent attacks on ravers from PLUR-challenged elements of our society
has left many of us feeling frightened and helpless.  When hugs and
smiles fail to disarm antagonism from the vibe-impaired, ravers only
need to be aware of the powerful arsenal already at their disposal.

Self Defense Tips For Ravers - Part 1 - RAVER WEAPONRY

Bean Bag Chairs - can be used as an assault weapon.  Toss at approaching
assailant to confuse or temporarily disable.  Can be used to absorb blows.
Will deflect bullets if filled with pennies or lead weights. [??! - Bart]

Blow pops - sharpen the stick end.  When threatened, slowly remove
blowpop from mouth, then thrust stick end forward into assailant's stomach
or groin area. [presumably these saucily named treats are akin to ice 
lollies. i imagine that an ice pop (still sheathed) could do a bit of damage 
too, especially before it melts]

Vinyl Records - With some practice, you can learn to toss records
frisbee style at assailant's neck area for beheading purposes.  Do
not practice near friends.

Whistles - Can be used to startle and infict hearing pain to oncoming
assailants.  Note: Although whistles are sometimes used as a distress
signalling device, most of your fellow ravers will flee from the sound
of them rahter than come to your aid.

Flyers - Stacks of smaller ones can be thrown in the face of an assailant
to blind them. [?] The large commercial ones can be used to inflict a serious
papercut.

Water Bottles - these too make good throwing weapons; even better if
filled. [possible a good cosh also? good for blunt object trauma injuries]

Blinking lights [or glow-sticks] - wave slowly in front of assailant to 
hypnotise them. If that fails, throw. 

Speaker cabinets - 2 or more ravers needed to lift and throw.  Get
permission from owner of sound system first.

Sound System - recent experiments have demonstrated that certain sound
frequencies can be tuned to resonate and rupture internal organs.  DJs
should always carry a few records with such sounds at renegade parties.
Do not mix these up with normal record collection.  Aim speakers at
antagonists, play at normal volume. [reminds me of the infamous ASR 
weapon system - the Anal Sonic Resonator!]

-- 
Bart, Ipswich, UK. barticle@hotmail.com or barticle@cyberspace.org
"...merely a series of sensory impulses which you now realise have
no real definite connection with outside reality."  Dark Star 1973